foxicide | UWOOO BUZEN UWOOOOOWOW

[dana that is so real me uploading all these LQ clips onto gdrive in panic,

the pig flies by, leaving a memory in its wake. the quality is so low HELP ME it's at least a little better in 720p,

anyway, Rang stands very still as this memory flashes before his eyes, thankfully this is not his first rodeo, so he's past the point of throwing a tantrum about suddenly seeing his past. instead, his expression looks a little melancholy when it ends,]

She never missed the jugular after that.

[fond..... his baby girl...]

[oh

this is cute and kinda funny. buzen seems a little startled, but seems pleased that it wasn't something horrific or upsetting. his expression settles into a small smile]

.... who is she to you, Rang?

[before he assigns them daughter and father or something - enough people got confused about himself and matsui that he

figures he might as well just ask]

[time to pingpong horrific mems at each other later!!!! for now, rang looks like he doesn't mind the question, even if his answer sounds a little dismissive. he has the nerve to be tsundere even tho he was soft at her]

A fox who owes me her life. I only saved her because the zookeeper got on my nerves.

[the saving part would probably count as horrific, not that he'd think it would affect buzen any,]

She reminds me of you and Matsui a little, like how she always asks questions. She's only been among humans for five years, so there's still a lot I have to teach her.

Ah, she's already got more time than me. I've only been among humans in this form for about three.

[truly wild,]

... you are a good instructor though, even if the content itself is a little bloody. But it's good to know what it takes to survive.

She would have made you call her 'noona' then.

[thinks about how i wanted to app yuri. the smirk on rang's face fades a little, then he shrugs]

I taught her more than how to survive. I taught her to always be the one who takes first, and to never be the one who cares more, and that humans will always disappoint her, no matter what.

[he is LEADING her on an UNHINGED path]

Noona...

[he tests the word out on his lips, curious. but then he'll listen along and if this was a human, he'd be worried! but. it's rang, and unfortunately this tracks.]

... that does sound a lot like the type of lessons you'd prepare.

Is that okay though? To never be the one who cares more...

[as the one who typically cares the most in a lot of situations, buzen finds the sentiment strange]

...It's what I've experienced.

[which probably still makes it bad]

Caring more or loving more... or caring at all has only ever hurt me, in every scenario.

[he pauses thoughtfully for a moment and he's about to answer, he really is but. it's time for his memory

enjoy kokobo, yaywon

Heave-ho! Heave-ho! ♪

You’re a traveler, and to these people, that’s all you’ll ever be. You speak with this man who doesn’t need to introduce himself - you know exactly who he is. Ota Dokan, the architect of Edo Castle, which withstood the tests of time and war to remain strong and steadfast into this modern day. You talk to him about all the beautiful things this world has to offer, and feel your heart warm knowing this person exists. He doesn’t ask your name, not that you would give it anyway.

(Not that it would matter. The Buzen Gou is already lost to history.)

You watch him join the men in building his creation, and promise them a grand feast at the end of their labor. It makes laughter spill from your lips before you can even stop it, and when Ame comes to get you, it almost feels too short. You say your farewells, and tuck this serendipitous little meeting into your heart. You hope that you don’t meet again.

Night falls. Days pass.

You meet again.

Your friend is brought to his knees in a fight—and is just barely saved. Monstrous creatures come to his rescue and set him free. As the fighting dies down, it quickly becomes obvious to you as you step on the scene. On this day, Ota Dokan could survive. He could walk out of this battleground, and build so many more grand sights. He could help so many more people. He could enjoy life.

Your blade ends that dream abruptly. You cannot allow that to happen.

Ame—beloved, darling Ame who you treasure so dearly—tries to take on this responsibility from you. But Ame is different from you. Ame has never raised his blade against the very same humans that you’re sworn to protect. So you laugh it off, you tell him not to think about it, even though your inconvenient heart is beating painfully in your chest. Even though you understand a little bit more, why Tsuru-san said ‘you can’t complete missions like this unless you hate yourself’. Maybe you’re starting to learn to hate yourself. No, you can’t let him feel this. You can’t let any of the others feel this, for as long as you’re able.

You should be the only twisted blade that knows what it’s like to cut down the very same people you adore. You should be the only liar. ]

[I SEE WHY YOU GAVE ME THIS MEMORY SPECIFICALLY,

Rang lets the memory unspool in his mind's eye. There's no stopping it at this point anyway, and maybe a part of him is curious too -- to see a memory of Buzen's. Every bit of it is Buzen -- from the beginning to the end. To how he makes friends with this human, and then ends his life in the next breath. Ame and Buzen speak of duty, and Rang watches as someone who can't make sense of it.

He looks at Buzen like he's seeing someone else in his stead,]

...Why did you kill him?

[he heard the word 'history' but also like ?]

[ . . . it's a complicated question, and yet the answer is simple.]

He was supposed to die that day. So I made sure it happened.

[the words he speaks are resolute and certain, but there's something so openly sad in his expression. wistful, like even now he wishes there was another way - but well aware there isn't.]

So... maybe in the simplest terms... because I had to?

[...]

Even knowing that, you still spoke to him. Why?

[befriended. or did that count as befriending?

it felt very brief. it felt like the impact this human had on buzen was greater than what little buzen left on him.]

[he looks confused a moment, like the question of 'why' never occurred to him.]

... why wouldn't I?

Everyone is going to die before me. [you think about how buzen and matsui are the oldest people in this game, even older than rang and the literal god] If I didn't talk to anyone just because I knew they'd leave first...

Wouldn't that be awfully lonely?

You let him into your heart.

[his eyes are focused on buzen, as if afraid of the answer]

Even though you knew that there'd be a possibility that you'd have to end his life yourself.

... that's just how it is, Rang.

[softly, and more than a little sadly]

For our mission, I might have to kill any human that I meet. Not just the ones that history remembers, but any of them. Sometimes, if history forgets someone, then I have to be the reason why for that too.

But those moments count for something too, I think... even though they won't last forever.

[his expression is still tight as he looks back at Buzen and then he finally looks away,]

You'll always be the one left behind.

[he wants to say 'how is that okay?' but it's a question he feels he knows the answer to already,]

[ . . . he looks thoughtful for a second, before he shrugs a little bit.]

I know. But... that's the hand you get sometimes, you know?

[he rubs the back of his neck and tries to put on a smile, even now.]

Carrying the memory of others with me, until eventually I'm the one forgotten.... I know how it sounds. It's pretty sad. But at the same time... it's what I would rather choose.

Instead of being left alone, unsure if I exist, or leaving so many others in limbo. Maybe it's a little self-serving... but I'd like to choose the one with a little more light if I can. Even if it's temporary.

UWOOO BUZEN UWOOOOOWOW

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